dr. appt

4 mont appt...

I saw a different doc bc mine just had a baby....I asked him a million questions and found out:

Leah's head mark that is red is fine. I don't need to worry about it.

By the time she is 6 months, we need to be prepared to continue any bedtime routine that we have implemented. Since we rock and nurse her to sleep, we either need to know that we'll be doing that for quite some time OR we need to break the habit before which is often done with the "Cry it out" method. I am not against other parents doing this, but do not want to do it with my own child at this time, but I know it might eventually have to be done. I mentioned to julian about doing it and he has a similar attitude to me so we agreed that we would revisit it when she's 5 months.

I mentioned how she cries all the time in the car and he thinks that Leah gets motionsickness. This makes sense bc Julian and his mom both get it.

we can start rice cereal but I am opting to wait util 6 months which is actually recommended.

shots were a killer....she is weepy.

ps

one year ago today, I found out I was pregnant with Leah....I had suspicions bc I was super hormonal, was peeing allllll the time already, and was very very bloated.

I was in LA and Julian was in SF. I brough tests that I had ordered online in bulk bc they were way cheaper....so he knew I would be taking them and was ok with it. I took one and got a faint line. I was with Paige and she freaked out and said that any line meant that I was pregnant. I couldn't believe it so she made me hold my pee for several hours and we went out and got a test that either said YES or not pregnant. And I took the test and shut my eyes and prayed and told God that I promised if I was pregnant that I would be the best mom that I could. Then when I opened my eyes it said YES! and I started crying. Then Paige made me test once more...actually what she did was went and took the test and dipped it into the cup herself. She got a false positive once and didn't want that to happen to me. Then once she saw the second YES! she jumped up and down and started screaming and we were laughing and jumping and scared her poor little son (who was 1 then) and he started crying!

I sent julian a picture of the preg. test but his phone didn't get picture texts at the time...so I told him on the phone and he was so happy he almost cried.

Speaking of crying, Leah is getting fussy wondering why I am not playing with her. I moved her to my lap and she's watching me type this but it will only last so long. I think I hear Julian so I'm off to play with the baby and do yoga.

sleep

We finally got some....I think it is because she is used to having us around all the time and so she's happy. But hopefully it is also because of a few things...First, we have been taking her outside each day for about 30+ minutes....even when it was cold, we budled her and took her. Then we started giving her a warm bath each night an let her play in it for a little bit. Then we bundled her up and got her in bed before 9pm. She slept 5+ hours in a row the last two nights and then today she slept an additional 4 straight through after I nursed her. She also napped better during the day which helped as well.

She gets her shots on Wednes. though, and I am sure this will throw things off. I hope she can continue to sleep like this....Once I went back to work, she would wake up every hour and a half.

Last night it took us almost 4 hours to get to my dad's when it should have taken 45 minutes. It was snowing and there was traffic and Leah was crying a ton...so we pulled over to a rest stop and changed her, fed her, changed her again, fed her again, and then changed her again. Then we knew she'd fall asleep. She took an hour and a half nap and we got to my dad's.

Right now Julian is running. I just fed the baby...she is laying next to me and concentrating very hard on her morning bathroom business. Then when Julian gets back, I am going to try to do some Yoga and get to the mall by 10 to buy an outfit for Leah's baptism.

vacation

Well, this has to be quick bc we are putting Leah to bed. It has been soooo nice to be home with Leah. I am having a lot of fun. She has been too overwhelmed with people, so I have mostly been holding her and we started taking her away from my family so that she feels better. We gave her a bath at 7 and had her in our room before 8pm. We are going to leave tomorrow and go stay at my parents house without them (to break up the drive) and then come back to WC Tuesday evening. We were originally going to stay here but I just think that it is better for Leah for us to go home early. I know my parents would want us to stay longer but they understand that we just have to do what is best for her. As for large family things, we have New Years with Julian's family which will most likely go similarly to how Thanksgiving went which was fun. And if she gets sad or scared, I will just go to bed earlier with her and Julian can stay out with friends if that's what he wants. I also know that Julian's mom will help me if I want to hang out still and switch off with me, but we'll just play that by ear. These days I am so tired anyway that it doesn't matter.

Leah is getting baptized on the 3rd in sac. We were going to go spend the night there saturday but because of how upset Leah has been getting around other people, I told Maryann that we will just meet her at the church. I think that's best.

I am not so proud of this last mommy moment....I ate garlic bread without knowing what it would do to Leah. She puked on me last night and then spit up a ton this morning. Maryann said her pee still smells like garlic. ugh.

Christmas Eve my extended family came over. It was fun. I held her most the night and she looked so pretty in her little dress. We saw my stepdad during the day and it was weird to not have my mom there, although I do enjoy his new girlfriend. It was fun to see Erica and Chris and Laurel too. We went back home to eat dinner but during Christmas dinner she started crying really hard so that was the end for me. I just left my plate at the table and upstairs we went. I really think that she dislikes larger groups.

My Grams and Gramps are here...Gramps turned 92 on the 26th. They just love Leah. It was so cute to see them with her...

On Christmas, she got tons of little presents but my faves are from tiff and Chris which were blanket and pillow pets which are a blanket that is a lady bug with a pillow face of a lady bug and then a pillow that wraps up as a stuffed animal that is a cute little bumble bee. And my dad started an education fund for her which was a great gift because we want to send Leah to private school and so it's a lot of moolah. We are trying to put money into an account for her for private school and a college fund.

At the snow, she has done well... we keep her bundled. This morning at about 7am it was snowing and we took her outside while it was snowing and showed her the snow. She smiled and then spit up all over me. It was pretty funny.

All in all, I loved this break so far but I can't wait to get back to our little haven in Walnut Creek. :)

xmas break!!!

Well, I am so excited to be on break and to be home with Leah... I can tell Leah is loving it too. She has started getting some separation anxiety and cries when I put her down lately though. I couldn't even get her to sleep in the swing like I usually can but I have loved all the cuddle time.

Yesterday other than a target run, Leah and I played all day.

Today I went out with my mommy friend Pam and her son Rhys (pronounced reese). We got breakfast and then went to baby yoga. I thought this was where mommys did yoga lifting your baby, but I was wrong. It was yoga for the baby! She had fun when we stretched her out and fun looking at all the other babies. Then we hung out at her house for a bit until we came home. It is fun bc I get to be with Leah all day and talk to a friend at the same time. Pam and her husband even sang a song for leah and played a guitar which she enjoyed and we did a thing called chicks-n-chickens where a dvd thing leads you through songs and dances and the baby ends up sleepin. I put her n the frontpack and danced around the livingroom and out she went.

Right now Leah needs a change of diaper and maybe a new outfit. Speaking of that, I was weighing her today (13.02 lbs) and noticed her onesie had old poo all up the back. It wasnt just a stain either so either she pooed and her daddy didn't notice it went up her back or it didn't wash out of the onesie and we didn't notice but either way it was gross haha.

ok on that note, off we go to the changing station.

1 week until break!

Well, my second week of teaching is over (thank goodness) and only 4 and a 1/2 school days until break. Phew.

This weekend has been a nice family weekend for Julian, Leah, and myself. Yesterday we got some Christmas shopping done. This of course means buying Leah stuff-- we got her a cute snow jacket, 2 hats because the hats I just bought her were too small, and then a few books that she'll like....one for the bath and one that has a little mirror on every page for her to see herself as a frog and other animals. I think that Santa is going to leave those for her this year.

We bought our family ornaments too. Julian picked out one that is a washing machine that you pull a string and it lights up and you see the clothes spinning in the water. Mine is a snow family with a mommy and daddy snowman holding a baby snowman. It is so cute. For Leah we picked out a classic whinnie the pooh in a red wagon that says Baby's 1st Christmas. We will be getting her one ornament per year from us and saving them so one day when she moves out, she will have 18+ ornaments that recount her years at home as a kid.

The tree is up and decorated. I tried to pull a box down from the bedroom and felt a pop where my c-section incision is...it hurt so I iced it but it feels okay today. If it gets worse, i will email my doctor, but it feels fine right now.

I am still looking for Julian's camera because we need to print out pictures but it is nowhere to be found. It's probably somewhere obvious and I keep missing it.

Right now Julian is playing videogames and Leah is in the frontpack. When she gets fussy, he bounces on the yoga ball and still continues saving the world from aliens or whatever. What a hero :)

ugh

bad work day...this is the hardest class I have had yet.

tonight I dressed Leah as a reindeer and she took a picture with Santa at my work. It was pretty cute....athough some kids tried to touch her and now I am paranoid she might get sick. To be clear, only one girl touched her hand and then I left bc I freaked out.

So now we are at home and have a fire and Leah is eating. She is still in her reindeer outfit.

first week done....only 30 something more to go

Well, the first week wasn't as horrible as I thought. I usually see Leah between 3:30 and 4:30 and then all weekend.

I am not sure how much she weighs but I want to weigh her tonight if I go to the baby store with my stepmom. I have to return a book that I checked out there so we shall see.

I still think that I want to be a stay at home mom for a few years but we'll see how it goes this year.

Brandi came and visited last weekend and we had fun. I felt kind of bad though because gone are the days where we can do a whole lot bc it's hard to with Leah, but she understood.

Ok well off to dinner and the baby store!

ps-Leah has been having a lot of pooping explosions.

Today

Today wasn't so bad....it wasn't so good either....but it wasn't so bad.

It went as I described it would in the previous blog entry....but add in Leah screaming the entire car ride home and me anxious. I made Leah anxious for a bit at home too bc I was so worked up about work. I have to learn not to do that. I just wish I never said I would go back but I am sure it is all happening for a reason. It will be good for us to save money and I know that one day I will be happy that I went back.

weekend

Thanksgiving was so much fun at Julian's house...hte turkey was awesome and it was fun to play poker at night...leah looked so cute in her dress and she was really happy that day! It was a great time.

I woke up at 4am on Friday and woke julian up... i wanted to quit my job...i actually called someone around 9am tring to convince her to take my job but she couldnt...plus i guess it would have been hard to get away with...

Then we went to my parents and julian and i went to see Blind Side...such a great movie.

last ight i ate brussel sprouts and leah flipped out and screamed and wouldnt take my breastmilk. I flt so bad that i held her long after she fell asleep and brought her to my bed around 5am for an hour too... good thing i had pumped milk...

tomorrow is my first day back... i am getting to lisas by7 ( sorry for typos...feeding and typing at dame time)...then i wil feed leah and get to work roun 7:30... I have a break for an hour at 10:20 and will pump and prep for the next day...at 12:20 i am going to see leah and then i teach from 1- 2:35 and then i will clean up and leave at 3 to get her and come home. It will be good....tuesday is the same except i have a staff mtg after work...Wednes, i don't have prep but stop teaching at 1:30 but have grade level mtg... julian's mom is coming and staying wed and thurs night... then friday brandi is coming for the weekend. pretty much though, all i want to do is play and hold leah from 3:30 on...

well gotta get us to bed...

holiday stress

Oh holidays.... and with a baby....so many joys....but I am anxious about a few things...

I am a little stressed out right now....yes, it is 2:46 in the morning and I've been up since 2am and cannot go back to sleep. I am anxious about Thanksgiving this year. I am looking forward to going to Julian's house because I haven't been but sad that I won't be with my family. Julian's mom is making turkey and mashed potatoes and stuffing and there will be pie and whipped cream...She made sure to ask me what I like for Thanksgiving and I can tell she just really wants me to feel at home and I love that about her. She is always very considerate...and for it being my first Thanksgiving away from my family and friends, I know it is going to be very nice....That isn't what I am stressed about... most of all, I am stressed out about everyone being soooo excited and wanting to hold the baby all night and wanting to hold her myself most of the time. Of course I will share, but when everyone holds her for 10 minutes, it can add up to quite a lot of time away from me, and it's not something that I am comfortable with.

I don't know why I am so stressed out about this....all the moms I know always hold their babies most of the time and let people hold them a little bit and take them back... everyone understands this. And yet, I am still stressed out about it. I've been up for an hour already.

When I am at my family's house, my extended family doesn't get to hold the baby that much at all. And honestly, I don't care about telling them no and that I want to hold her or that they can hold her later or let them hold her for a little bit but take her back...Julian and I usually hold her and that's pretty much it....my stepmom or sister will for a little bit but I can and do just take her back... We went to a Halloween party with my family and I held her for 99% of the time and didn't feel bad about it. I think that one aunt held her for about 3 minutes and another held her for about 5 minutes and maryann held her for about 5 minutes....everyone else just looked at her while I was holding her and I didn't feel bad about this.

A few weeks ago I went out to frozen yogurt with Kathryn and she was telling me that her cousin feels the same way...she said that at holidays with both families, she will let people hold the baby but just for a little bit and then take her back or will ask her husband to go get her for her....so I know that I'm not the only one out there who feels this way.

It stresses me out when I get places and people immediately want to take the baby from me...I like to get her familiar first and comfortable. Everyone gets so excited and I TOTALLY understand that...but I also don't like when people take her and then just walk away.....but I reallllly get stressed out when she cries for a bit and so I just need to take her back. I know that people are capable of calming her, but as her mom, I want to do it. It's nothing personal against everyone else, it's just my child and my job and my heart that feels like it is aching when I hear it.

I kept waking Julian up while I was feeding Leah... "Julian, what if I don't get to hold her at all that night?" and he'd reply, "Sam, you are her mom. You dont have to feel bad if you want to hold her the entire night." and then about 20 minutes later, "Julian, what if people come to take her from me?" "Sam, you can say no. It's okay". Don't get me wrong, it's not that I won't share the baby a little bit. People can hold her here and there....I just don't want it to be expected that everyone will get to hold her and pass her around all night.

Now it has been an hour and 22 minutes since I have been up. I am thankful that so many people love my child and are excited about seeing my child....How sad it must be to not have family that want to hold her and love her....this is something my baby girl will never need to experience and I am thankful for that..... I just hope that Julian's family reacts similarly to how my family did in understanding that I love them and I LOVE their love for my and Julian's baby....and I'll share her a little bit but I still need to be the main person with her and caring for her...

Oh, I am going to be sleep deprived tomorrow. Sarah is going to try to take some pictures of Leah for a Christmas card. She is going to wear a cute red dress with black polka dots. She is such a doll.

Ok well, I better try to get some sleep. Leah will be up in an hour I bet... I will need to say my prayers again and ask God to take my anxiety away for the holidays and for going back to work as well. That stress could fill up a hundred blog pages, but I'll save it for another day.

Tying to the book that Leah and I read in the rocking chair, all I have left to say is ..."Goodnight Moon."

twinkle toes

Today I put Leah in an outfit called twinkle toes. That's really the only reason that I titled this entry that...

Today we snuggled in the morning like usual and then met the other mommies at a painting place. The girl was NOT so pleased that we were all there, but poop on her....doesn't she know that we need to get out too? I painted a mug and leah slept...I attempted to get a hand and foot print on the mug and covered her little feet with paint and her little hand with paint...and it was just a fun mess. It turned out pretty cute....certainly not fantastic, but it was fun until all the babies started crying and disrupting the place...but we were finished by then.

After that, I went and got a cookie AND cupcake from the nearby bakery. After that I saw that my car had been marked bc we can only stay in the parking lot 2 hours...well, baby wipes come in handy so I just took a wipe and wiped off the chalk and stayed there another two hours and ate lunch at Chow in Lafayette with a few other moms.

We got home and then I fed Leah and went on a 40 minute walk. She napped. I really enjoy taking ehr for walks and "wearing" the baby. I think it's very comforting for her and I like to have her with me.

I am not looking forward to going back to work but trying to be positive. It is only 3 weeks until I get to be home for a good two weeks and just enjoy her. We got her a cute hat for the snow. My stepmom bought her a warm snow suit (although it isn't waterproof because she will never be in the snow this year...but just for if we are outside at all like walking to the car or what not).

I bought a journal that logs out each half hour and it has places to check off when she naps, plays, eats, and gets changed. I started filling it out and will ask Julian's mom and Lisa to do it for a while so that we can all communicate that way. When so many of us are watching the baby, it's important that she is still on some sort of consistent routine. :)

Tomorrow I am going to a class about baby teeth...

Here is the class description:

Tips for Teething
Infant Oral Health/care of teeth
Preventing Cavities
Development (which teeth, when)
What to expect at the first dental visit
Topical Fluoride
Trauma Prevention

I'll let you know how that goes after I go there! Ok well, it's time to get Leah down for another nap...Hopefully she sleeps until Julian gets home and is rested.

pumping class

Today I went to a class that showed me stuff for pumping and maintaining my breastmilk supply for when I go back to work. It is a lot harder to do when working but here's the most important stuff:

*I need to pump about 2-3 times at work per day.

*When people give Leah a bottle, it is important to tickle the top lip and make her latch on. It's also important not to have her just suck the tip, but to get the whole bottle nipple in her mouth. This keeps her correctly latching for when she breastfeeds, otherwise it will be painful and not very productive.

*It should take her about 20 minutes to take the bottle just as if it would take 20 minutes to breastfeed. If not, it will make bottlefeeding more desirable because it's easier...

*I need to work with Leah's caregivers so that when I come home or pick her up, she is ready to feed. This means that we will need to talk each afternoon so that they know what time I will be there so that Leah is not just fed a bottle when I walk in...She should have her last bottle about 2hours before I go home....so around 2:00-2:30pm. This will make her ready to eat when I get there. Breastfeeding ups the milk supply much more than pumping does so it's important to do that as much as possible.

Julian is talking with Leah now...she is much more verbal these days making noises. It is so cute!!!

We are watching Jon and Kate plus 8...the finale.

answer

Jen, in response to your question-

Leah weighs 11 pounds and 9oz as of today. Soon she will gain weight less rapidly...

So I only actually ot her to stay asleep for about 45 min. exactly.... and then when I fed her, she acted like she was done because she doesn't like the bottle. I fed her about 2.5 oz of pumped milk and I just had a feeling that she was still hungry even though she was completely wanting nothing to do with the bottle....so, I started to breastfeed her and she ate for about 5 minutes actively which at this point gives her a lot of milk.....so that's why it's really important to keep offering her the bottle over and over because she just would rather not take it....

We need her to eat about 25oz of milk throughout her day starting from when she wakes up so that she is tanked up enough to get through most of the night wihtout waking up.

Routines for going back to work.

Today I went to a class and learned important stuff regarding feeding and sleeping...I want to write it down so that anyone that watches Leah can have the same info...

the important stuff/cliff note version

*she needs to eat every 2-2.5 hours.

*she needs at least 2.5 oz per feeding.

*she must take several naps during the day lasting no less than 45min. and no more than 3 hours.

*She must be asleep by the time she has been awake for 2 hours.

Now here is the full version:

SLEEP

She should only be awake for a MAX of 2 hours (which includes when she eats) Then please get her to take a nap that lasts AT LEAST 45 minutes but preferably an hour. The nurse said that anything less than that is not going to work for a nap. If she doesn't sleep well during the day, it is highly likely that she will not sleep well at night. If she wakes up before or near 45 minutes, try to comfort her and get her to go back to sleep because the nap doesn't count until she's reached that 45 minute mark. Even then, see if she can sleep a little longer by patting her or whatever. They suggested patting her because every hour (or with Leah probably a little less) babies go from deep sleep to light sleep....they said that this was for survival so they don't sleep so long that they suffocate or something...waking up often helps them with their breathing, etc. It makes sense I suppose. So if you can get them to get in another deep sleep, the nap will last longer.

EAT

When she wakes, please feed her. She needs to eat a minimum of 2.5 oz per serving but should be 3-4. A full serving can be up to 5 oz. If she only takes a little, keep offering it to her. Please do not wait until she starts crying out of hunger to start to offer the bottle. Every 2-2.5 hours, she should be eating. The rule of thumb (so says a lady in class) is offer her the bottle even if she is not crying (crying is a late sign of hunger) offer it for 5 minutes. If after 5 minutes she doesn't want it, wait 15 minutes or so and try again. She prefers the breast and will sometimes resist. Beyond that, at 3 months her vision is increasing tremendously and it makes it so that she gets distracted much easier. She found her hand recently and so she'd rather look at that than eat but after a few minutes, she goes back to eating.

PLAY- during play time, make sure to include tummy time. Make sure she is supervised so she doesn't suffocate when she is on her tummy. The way that I learned to do it is to always start them on their back...play with them and then roll them on their tummy. Have one toy for her to see and keep your hand on her back and lay and talk with her so she doesn't get scared. She usually lasts about 10 seconds where she starts to fuss. I leave her there and cheer her on for as long as she can take it without getting too frustrated.....then roll her onto her back again. Do this a few times per day so that she gets her muscles strong to crawl. During play time she loves to look in a mirror and watch her mobile spin. She enjoys when you read and sing to her and with her. She just today for the first time grabbed and hung on to a little ball we have. It was so cute.

When she starts to divert her gaze and cry a little it usually means she has had enough and do something quiet like cuddle and get ready for a nap.

Our routine:

I try to follow something I got from "the baby whisperer" which is the EASY method. Follow this order: E-eat, A-activity, S-sleep, Y-your time (do whatever while she is sleeping). and then repeat. This will ensure that we all are on the same routine if we all follow this method. That way when I pick her up, you can tell me that she just ate, so I will know automatically that it's time to do an activity....or if she has been playing, then I will know that I need to get her to take a nap, etc.

Naps have been a challenge but I think that I found the key...

To get her to go to sleep, you have to catch it before she is overtired and crying...swaddle her after you've played, (a trick is to do this near the mobile :) she stays distracted.) Then take her to the yoga ball and bounce her. If she is somewhere without a yogaball, just bounce her up and down. Or try a bouncer. I also use white noise and the combination gets her to nod off after about 10 minutes. If she already started crying, it can take way longer...hence why I say it's super important to pay attention to when she starts to yawn. In just a few min. after that, she gets hysterical. Fickle little thing. :)

Here would be a sample of our day:

6:00am- Feed. (remember she needs to eat at least 2.5oz. So keep feeding her even after she takes a break)

- Activity

-get ready for nap.

8:00-9:00am- nap

9:00am- Feed full serving.

- play

- get ready for walk and load up stroller

-make sure she is all changed and ready to go.

by 10:45 start walking....she'll cry a little but as long as she has been fed and changed, she should quiet down.

11:00-12:00 walk and she should be sleeping in the stroller during this time.

12:00- feed

and then it just continues on like that.

She is taking a nap right now and she started crying....so I just went in there and started the white noise heartbeat again and rocked her for a few minutes and set her back down. She fell back asleep. I will keep doing that until she has slept at least 45 minutes.

Ok, well my thoughts are down on paper, so we will see how this goes. I wish I could do it myself but since I can't, Lisa and Julian's mom will make fabulous substitutes.

cuddle bug

Leah has been so cute recently (she always is) but she has been cuddling in the morning and going back to sleep wtih me. Today we actually napped until 10am. I am beyond rested! Then we played a bit and I fed her again and we went for a long walk. I had to call Julian because I didn't exactly know where I was...but I had only gone about 2 miles. She napped about the whole way until we were almost home. It's a good thing that I pack a bottle or I would have to walk around with her attached to me so she could eat. I actually did that at Carter's yesterday when I was getting her clothes. I have to say that was def. something i SWORE that I would never do and would look at other mothers and wonder "what are they thinking?" but I'll just add that to the list of things I said I wouldn't do :). I DID wear a cover so I was not exposed though! The guy said that other women go thre and just whip it out totally bare so he said that he was totally cool with me doing it with a cover.

I actually was able to do 2 loads of laundry and shower today as well. Right now she is sleeping in her swing and I am watching TV. Days like today are so great....just spending time with her and she's happy and not fussy and naps easily. I live for these days. :)

To top it all off, my fruitsnak pack was full of reds and oranges. It is such a good day.

little one

Leah is napping right now. She has had 2 nights this week where she has been really overstimulated by too many people. But both times, once she was home with just us, she was a happy girl again.

We have about 2 weeks left with me staying home. I am pretty sad about going back to work, but I will come home as soon as I can after work and spend time with her. I think the next 7 months are going to be a challenge for me, but the important thing is that she will be safe and I will be able to spend as much time with her as possible starting at 4pm. I am counting on my fingers saying 4-5-6-7-8-9 ok 5 hours before we put her down and then time in the middle of the night for feeding and stuff. That's not too bad, I suppose...but not my 24 hours pretty much that I've gotten used to. Somewhere in there I will find time to work out but I will probably just walk with the baby...On rainy days, I have no idea...Maybe gym in the morning before work.

Today Leah has been napping really well and been very happy. She has been smiling at me all morning and then I put her under her mirror and she is just smitten with herself and doens't even know it. She keeps smiling and kicking her feet. She thinks she is looking at another baby but doesn't yet know that it's herself. It's so cute.

She is all packed up and sleeping in her stroller right now. I am going to take her to the park for a walk and then I am meeting a friend and her baby at a "babywearing class" where they show you different ways to "wear" your baby....I have slings and wraps and stuff like that so they help show you all the different ways to try it things. After that I will probably get a coffee or frozen yogurt with Pam and then head home to meet Julian. We have our baptism class tonight at 7:30. Neither Julian nor I are looking forward to it but we get to bring the baby so we'll just focus on her and we won't be as bored. For some reason it was really important to my dad to pick out a christening gown for Leah and it arrived last week. I'll look at it tonight. Ok, well we are off to walk and go to class.

10 weeks

Unless I have lost count, my baby is 10 weeks today! I think she is about 11 pounds as well. She has started to sleep longer periods during the night...we usually can get between 4-6 hours at one stretch followed by 1.5-3 hours....of course there are nights where it's 2-3 all over again, but the trend is that she is sleeping longer for now. That makes me happy since I am going back to work and need to have energy for 34 (some very) roudy munchkins.

I am not happy about going back to work. I just keep telling myself that I can leave after contract hours are up and come home...but it still doesn't seem like enough time with Leah. I had a hard time sleeping 2 nights ago because I just kept thinking about it. I don't know how I am going to leave her and I feel like I will just think about her all day. I wish I never said I'd go back to work...ugh.

Her Lola is here right now and Leah is due for her nap. When she's not sleepy and crying, she smiles a lot now and makes cooing noises. She can have a whole conversation with you if you make the noises back at her. It's so cute. Julian taught her how to wave back (well, she just moves her arm and waves it) It was adorable. She moves her right arm and not her left so we think we have a right handed dribbler in our house.

Halloween Fun

So we went to my friend Kelly's daughter's first birthday party....she was born on Halloween. I think that would be a fun bday to have....Leah dressed as her pea pod and Lily was a bee. It was so cute to see them together. Lily was very sweet to her and gave her kisses, etc. At night, we went to my parents' house and hung out. Julian and I were going to go out but then my stepmom made fried chicken and you know how Julian loves friend chicken! It was delicious.

Tomorrow is Leah's 2 month birthday AND her 2 month doc. appt. We are going to get her shots tomorrow and she is NOT going to like it. It might make me cry watching her so upset! I have the tylenol already packed though.

Today we went for a walk but she was fussy......so we came home and played, ate, and then napped. We did kangaroo care/skin to skin....it is supposed to help regulate baby's heartrates and calm them down to have their skin touched to their parents. She did calm down and napped and then woke up and pooped all over herself and me. That was fun. I got her cleaned up and set her in her crib....now she started to cry. Gotta go :)

Tick Tock

Today Leah thought I was so funny. There is a song where you go Tick tock, tick tock, tick tick tick tick etc. I don't even know the right words but she just smiled and smiled when I sang/chanted it. I think she liked it because it was quick and she liked her legs moving, etc.

Last night she still had a hard time breathing bc she is congested. I fed her at 12:30am and ended up falling asleep with her on me....woke up at 2:30 and handed her off to Julian. She was up at 4:30 and then I fed her again and held her....she went back to bed but I couldn't. She was making all sorts of noises for hours. After Julian went to work, I held her and tried to doze off....that's the hardest part is the sleep deprivation. It's all so worth it but just much harder when you are so tired.

At 2pm I took Leah to meet up with a girl from my Mommy and Me class. We went to Kinders and got a sandwich and then were planing on walking but both of our babies needed to be nursed and so that took time...and once we put them in the carrier, they both needed to be changed and fed again. We went to a park after that and Leah screamed again because she hates that car seat. She cried each time for pretty much the whole drive. I put he rin the stroller and she cried a ton. So I held her and she was happy. I laid a thing down and she rested on a picnic table and really liked it. She was smiling and very content. I think it was the perfect weather and she just liked having the breeze blow over her. I put her in a sling and walked around the lake and it was fun. She is just needing extra cuddling today I think which I like. We came home and she crashed on me and I just got her in the swing so that i could eat some dinner.

Danielle came over to watch Private Practice on DVR. I am going to take her home in a few minutes and we are going to grab a coffee or a frozen yogurt. Julian has his fantasy basketball draft but has assured me that he can handle her for the hour. She's sleeping right now anyway...

Tomorrow we have mommy and me again. I am loving being home with her and am not looking forward to going to work. I just have to enjoy each day for the next month. :) Ok off to go get a decaf coffee. :)

sickface

Well, Leah got sick the other night. It was so sad....Julian woke up first to her kind of choking on mucus...and turns out it was just reallllly thick. We had to do a steam shower, prop her up, use the nasal aspirater (which she hates). She had sick eyes where they are glossy and a really weak, tired cry the whole next day. last night was better but we still were up with her trying to help her breathe better....then today she has been fussy but seems to be breathing better. I overdresed her....she was hot and was the fussy one at the mommy and me group......She cried hysterically in the car...I felt so bad. I had a huge headache. She HATES the car and it's so sad how upset she gets....you would think someone was hurting her. Her cute little tears pour and pour.

She just woke up from a nap. The only way I get her to sleep without being on me in the day is if by chance after a walk, she is still asleep in her carseat....so she screamed the whole way home but fell aslleep right when I took her out of the car...I think she was just all tired out. Oh she's crying. Gotta go :)

Rainy day

Yesterday was Leah's first rainy day...we spent the first few hours cuddled up and she slept while i watched the rain. Then we went to our first mommy and me group. It was fun to see other moms witheir 0-3 month olds... Leah did well in the car and was very happy all day. Then she slept 5 hours in a row, ate, slept an hour and a half, ate, then needed to be held an hour and then was up...so today we have a breastfeeding class today and then my stepmom might visit today too. Ok... well, it has been fun with this little one :)

breastfeeding class

Well, Jen asked about the breastfeeding support class and if it gets awkward fast. Probably to a non-breastfeeding person, it would be awkward...but when u are breastfeeding, you get accustomed to just whipping it out to feed your kid and actually most of the time (at least in my house) covering up is more for the other person around (so THEY don't feel awkward). In public, it feels weird to me and I use a cover for my wellbeing, but it's getting easier. At first, I really didn't want to even with a cover, but I see a bunch of people doing it now and it doesn't look bad with the shield.

So at the class, you go in and take a seat on the floor. They have chairs that are the kind that u can lean into and they support you but you are still on the floor. Oh, you grab some water because staying hydrated is important. And then about 8 people were there yesterday and there is a lactation consultant who is the group leader....so one person starts and you go around in a circle and introduce yourself and your baby and then u ask a question or say what problem you're having....like I said, breastfeeding has more challenges than one would imagine....and then the lactation person answers the question ( some questions were about one baby hadn't pooped in 10 days...another's poop was green....some women are having pain in one breast more than they other....I asked a question about how Leah wouldn't take breastmilk after dinner one day bc i think the broccoli I ate upset her....people asked about ways to help their kid burp better, spit up questions, about pumping and storing, about breast accessories, etc) During that time, people just feed their kid. One lady used a coverup but the rest just did it because we're all in the same boat. They have a scale there and so you'd get up and weigh your baby before the feed and then weigh her after to see how many ounces she took in. Leah took in 2 ounces and she needs about 3-4 per feeding, but still 2 was good for her to take in at one stretch. When I went to the consultant on my own, Leah took an hour to take in about 2 ounces and she did the recent one in about 5-10minutes.

She is sleeping now and so I am going to rest. :)

10/7/09

i don't even know if that is the date but i guessed that it is,,,,, things are good here. last night we got about 7 hours of sleep which is the best night yet....we got 4 hours, fed, then close to 3 i think...a few days before that she woke up at 3 and didnt want to go back to sleep...every night is a new adventure. she is so much more alert now and enjoys watching her mobile spin...

we were having breastfeeding issues---it's actully really hard....she is feeding right now so excuse the typos....only have one hand. we are going to a breastfeeding class today so hopefully it helps.... last night she freaked out about the breastmilk...i ate broccoli at dinner and i think she rejected it...

julian and my first anniversary is on sunday...we want to do a movie and dinner....

i will try to post more often....it is hard to find time to even go to the bathroom these days though :)

over and out

sleeping

well...she is 3 weeks on thurs. sleep has been up and down...we get about 2-4 hours at a time and about 4-6 hours total a night...usully she wakes and julian changes her and hands her off. i feed her for about 40 minutes and then try to put her down...sometimes it happens right away but has taken up to 4 hours to get her down again...then we get 2 hours more of sleep and it starts all over....today i got her down for a nap and got to nap, though...she just wants to be held all the time which makes it hard to sleep too...but it is sweet to cuddle with her, though.

it is about that time to go to bed now...

doc appt.

Leah's first doc appt. went really well. her doc is really nice and young. She said Leah is doing great. She's pretty small...like 30th percentile for weight and 18 for height but she said that doesn't mean much now...and as long as it is between the 5th ad 95th percentiles, all is well.

2 weeks and 1 day old

A friend from work said that the first 2 weeks are the hardest to adjust to and she was right. It's definitely feeling better now. Julian's mom and maryann helped out a lot during that time and it was helpful and now it feels good to be on our own too. Julian's rocking her to sleep (she has the hiccups right now..she used to get them all the time when I was pregnant too)... We shampooed her hair for the first time tonight and she seemed to really like the warm bath water. This was good news because she was pretty fussy all day today, so it was nice to NOT have her cry at something new. I think she is just hungry a lot and so we spend most of our time feeding and then resting.

her cord fell off today and now we can see her little belly button. It is a shallow innie right now but there is still a tiny scab...we shall see.

ok, gotta go.

first outing

well, we had our first little family outing. Julians mom and Maryann and Julian and Leah and myself....we all went to CPK. I lasted about 3 hours until my milk leaked all over. TMI I know....but I will figure that out. I hear that nursing women need to wear shirts with prints (not solids) because it shows less. I had no idea this would happen either....but it's so weird...like when my baby cries then some response happens within me and my body says "Oh, time to feed the baby". This better get better before I go back to work. I would hate to be standing up in front of my class and then some kid raises her hand, "Um, Mrs. G?" and points and my shirt is soaked.

I think that Oprah is going to be part of my day each day for the next few months.

Leah had a really good night last night. We have this swaddle blanket thing that she screams bloody murder when i put her in it, but then once she calms down, she's better....

Ok well, I am going to continue watching Oprah now and rest.

pics

pics

nights

are tough with a newborn!  We didn't get a singel second of sleep last night. she just had the roughest time....maybe it was because i didn't burp her enough....she hates being put in her crib that is next to us bc she is so used to being held and rocked from the whole time in the womb and then in the days....plus she used to be active at night and sleep in the day so she has the reverse pattern as us.....

so it's about 9pm and I am going to sleep bc in about 2 hours she'll need to be fed but at least i can jump start getting rest. Julian's mom is sleeping over and so in the morning we can hand her over which is a huge help.  the breast feeding is a killer right now though.  julian has been really great through everything. he gets up with us when I have to feed her and helps change her diapers and all that.  We will eventually have to figure out a schedule so we aren't both so sleep deprived all the time. 

cross your fingers tonight goes better than last night. the upside is that she's just so cute that you want to be with her all the time, but it is so hard to have her crying and upset like that and not yet know how to fix it....

welcome home, baby

So we are home and it as been an adventure. We are so happy having Leah.

Really quickly I will sum up the events....we went to the hospital and at 9pm wed they gave me pitocin and shoved a cathetar with a balloon up my cervix to dilate me....it hurt. They started everything early because i was contracting on my own a lot. Sarah and Julian were there and we all waited for things to get going....the contactions got stronger in the middle of the night...they gave me a morphine shot and stuck it straight in my butt muscle. I screamed and julian laughed. seriously haha. Then at 6 am, the alarms started going off because Leah's heart rate was dropping a lot. They rushed in and moved me around so that it heled her breathe more. Super scary. Then a few hours later it happened again. I got my epidural at 3 cm and that took away the pain. The heart rate drpped again and then the doctor told me that we were going to mointor a little longer and then he'd come in and we'd decide how to proceed. We didn't have enough time for that to thappen because her heart rate dropped a ton and everyone rushed in and they decided to do an emergency c section. Her heart rate went back a little bit which helped. They rushed me into the room and then about 15 nurses, doc, and other people took they places. Julian was the last person in. They tested out "can you feel this, can you feel this, etc" until they had a good level and then they went for it. I felt the pressure of them cutting and taking stuff out of me, etc. It didn'thurt but I was terrified and just kept praying that she'd be okay. After only a few minutes they had her out and Julian and I both cried really hard (i am sure he's happy I shared that) and julian went and watched her get weighed and her apgar scores (an 8 then a 9 which is good). I didn't get to hold her until after they stitched and stapled me and took me to recovery. As hectic as it was, it was the best moment of my life (along with my wedding with julian) and worth everything.

The recovery has had its ups and downs but we're getting there. We are home. The first night was really hard and breastfeeding is seriously very difficult. My milk just came in in the middle of last night (I woke up with a huge heat wave and felt nauseous briefly and realized what happened. This will help her gain weight because she has lost a little too much weight. She is jaundiced so we have had to make a trip to the doc and have to go back tomorrow....we are crossing her fingers that she is better by then.

Can't complain....we're just really happy to have our baby girl healthy and home.

and we are off

Sarah is here.  We are going to eat a light dinner (at in and out haha) and then goign to the hospital.  We prob won't update the blog when we are gone because there isn't wifi. We may post facebook updates though.  Baby will be here in less than 48 hours (let's aim for 24)

dilation chart for fun. I am somewhere after a cheerio (hopefully to the banana but prob not yet.

almost time

We call in about 4 hours to see if they will take me tonight. My contractions have stayed and are still uncomfortable but not unbearable.  I hope that I am dilating so that I don't have to have as much time before my epidural.  Anyway, Sarah is on her way over at 3 or 4.  Then we will call about 5...hopefully get a light meal and then head over to the hospital at 7.  Then we don't leave without Leah.  Crazy.

hmm

contractions are getting stronger and I am uncomfortable.  I really hope it happens tonight so i don't have to be induced but I have a feeling that putting my hopes in writing will jinx it.  We shall see.

update on doc appt.

So I get there and they say that my appt had been moved to tomorrow. That would be almost okay if i wasn't being induced tomorrow AND if they had actually called to tell me this. I pretty much told them that julian took off work and I was really contracting and wanted to be seen....so they got me in haha.  Don't mess with a huge 9 month pregnant woman.  They apologized a lot bc they messed up by not even calling me to confirm that it was okay to move my appt.

So they did not strip the membranes bc u have to be dilated a good amount i think....last week I was completely closed and not thinned out at all....Today I had started to dilate and was a 1 and have thinned out half way already  to 50%! I was excited...she said my cervix is very soft and the baby's head is very low and that I am in a good spot to have a good induction tomorrow.....before i was set up to fail...they have a point system to tell if you your chances of needing a c section due to a failed induction (meaning that your body can't be forced to dilate and get the baby out vaginally).

Still contracting and they are stronger than yesterday.  

Julian is happy that he will be able to make the fantasy draft tonight at 8...I still am hoping to go into full blown labor before then. :)

tomorrow

well....leah decided to stay in her cozy home another day. her eviction process will start tomorrow if she doesnt come before that.

membrane stripping at 3:30. i will write after that experience.

doc appt.

Well.... I had my last Non Stress Test appt....I was very dizzy and they were worried about my coloring and my bp shot up. They had me there for over 2 hours and I heard them talking about what to do with me. I was contracting a lot and the high risk doctor thought I was going into labor but the nurse had to explain to him that these contractions were not new. He sent me to go get blood work done and all of it turned out okay (kaiser emails you and u can look at your results). He increased my medicine dosage which sucks. I hate taking more meds. Oh well.

I'm still contracting. I have an appt at 3:30 tomorrow for the doctor to check to see if I am dilated and if so he is going to strip the membranes. I tried to have it done a week ago but it couldn't happen so hopefully this time it can. The lady next to me at the NST appt said that it's really painful. She's had it done 4 times but she said it's worth it to get labor going. It should't last long though...the pain, I mean.... But who knows, maybe I'll go into labor on my own and not make it to my induction. That would be good.

Sarah came over and put finishing touches on the room. She hid the wires to the lanterns and it looks lovely. I have to ask if she can be in the room for the birth as my Doula. Ok well....that's really all for now.

I am not sure if I have written about how much I LOVE ice cold drinks right now. The colder the better. It's the weirdest thing. Ok. goodbye.

monday morn

woke up crampy....drank rest of gatorade and need more..... will see if cramps get stronger.

Sunday evening.

Well....still having light contractions. My friend Lisa described her contactions as when she was in so much pain she became delirious and I am not anywhere near that point but I'll let you know when I get there.

updates for today....well, sorry boys but I have to keep it real, things are getting ready for breastfeeding because I started leaking today. If only there was a BABY for gosh sakes.

I ate pineapple, mango, and bounced on a birth/yoga ball AND we tried different pressure points oh and walked.... Prob won't do anything but who knows....

Tomorrow I have an appt at 1 something. Tuesday is membrane stripping. Julian is concerned about making his fantasy draft but I am sure that things won't happen unti I go stay at the hospital on wednes. or thursday morn.

contractions

off and on last two nights but nothing strong enough. keep thinking, "this could be it!" but no... soon enough, I suppose...

nesting

Ok so the nesting has officially begun....yesterday I was so happy to scrub out the fridge. I feel much better now. Today I made sure to vacuum the living room, clean the bathroom counters, mirrors, doors, floor, toilet and started Julian's bathroom....and then did the kitchen floor and counters....and I STILL have some energy. I hope this means that Leah wants to come out.

back to the countdown....6

6 days until induction. I felt really relieved last night as I was in my own nice bed and not in the hospital....and then today it felt good to not have drugs pumping through me making me feel horrible and contracting. So overall- today has been good! Now if only she would come on her own before next week so that I don't have to go through this next week and I can go through some labor at home and relaxed.

the NST appt went well. I was having a bunch of contractions but they didn't hurt. They are getting stronger though. My next and last appt for that is on Monday. I hope that I have her by then though and don't have to go in.

Sarah might be able to be at the birth now which is good....so I have to email my doc and see if he's okay with it.

Having more contractions now....such a tease.

nausea

Today has been a day of feeling sick and nauseated. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick and it is lingering. At least I don't have to go in and get induced today though.

So here's a little TMI... yesterday they checked my cervix (internal exam) and I am still not dilated, it's still long (both not signs of labor) but it's soft which is really good. That means it's starting to get ready for labor. He said that when it's regular it feels like a styrofoam cup but when it is soft it feels like frozen yogurt. haha his comparison, not mine. Anyway, that's the update. The goal is that the other 2 things will be better come this time next week. I hope that she comes on her own before then because it will be less painful.

I have a doc. appt tomorrow morning and then one Monday afternoon and then one Tuesday afternoon and then Wed. induction. Same pattern as before. Over and Out.

news....

They pushed my induction back a week so we get to go through all these posts again.....

the doctor that scheduled me messed up with the calendar....my doc wants me to be 39 weeks. I'm cool with this as long as she's ok.

over and out.

3 days

Last night we went to Skipolini's and ordered Prego Pizza which is supposed to help you go into labor within 48 hours.  We'll see if that happens, however- it did cause me to be ridiculously thirsty all night long with sporadic cramping.  I think it's meant for when u are at 40 weeks and i am only nearing 38.  

Tomorrow they are going to try to strip my membranes but again, i have to be dilated a bit for it to work.  If I am not dilated, there is a much higher chance that I am going to need a C Section and REALLY didn't want one.  

Time is ticking down.  I am going to go get a snack and nap.

5 days

I am having a lot more pressure down in my lower abdomen which is good bc it means the baby is contniuing to drop.

Today we are going to straighten up more and go to Babies R Us (or maybe tomorrow) but we don't really want to go. There's just crap we need to get before she gets here and well, we are running out of time...

We met a couple during our birthing class that we liked...the girl is a teacher too and the guy is a grad student at Berkeley studying molecular biology or something (julian will correct me)...i guess he ran cross country or something too so as long as he likes beer, I think that julian will like hanging out with him. They are having a girl too so hopefully we can do play dates (yes, that's now in our vocabulary....how sad.) Anyway, they are having us over for a bbq tonight which is cool. I figure unless any of you fools want to get someone knocked up or get knocked up and move by me, we have to find a few not lame parent friends so we can kick it while the kids entertain each other.

Julian is at the gym right now and then he's getting me some cinnamon toast crunch cereal. I've been pretty good about not just sending him out, but since he is passing the store anyway.... I mean, I couldn't pass it up. I mean, it's for the baby...SHE wants the cinnamon toast crunch.

I keep hoping my water will break on its own and i can go into labor but it's not happening. It is getting pretty uncomfortable though. By the way, I don't know if I mentioned that MOST women's water never breaks....the hospital breaks the majority of them. Movies always show it and it's not the way it goes. I still wait for it to happen, though, bc it does happen....just not as often as everyone thinks.

less than a week left...

Ok so as per JP's request, I will post more....I will try to post every day since there's not much time left.

There are already a few updates.  I had said before that on the night of the 26th they are going to "strip my membranes".  This is not true.  I am actually having that done this coming Tuesday at 4:10 and apparently it hurts like hell.  I have to be dilated a little bit for him to try it so I am really crossing my fingers that by the time I get there, I am dilated enough.  Then I will go home and get everything ready.....and come back to the hospital on Wed. evening where they will give me a medicine that they put up on the cervix to soften it and help me start dilating more....this will hopefully jumpstart the labor.  The next morning they will start the pitocin and crank up my contractions.  For that to have a high success rate (so I've heard and read) I need to be thinned out half way (like your cervix thins) and be dilated to a 2 or 3.  Hopefully the other 2 procedures will help me be there.  At some point early on, they better give me drugs. 

Now, on a different note.  Sarah is a sick face right now and will not be able to be at the birth anymore.  She is very sad about this and I of course wish she could be there but there's nothing we can do because the baby has to be protected.  So she is going to send magic healing powers to me via  waves in the universe.  I think that it will work perfectly.  Alas, she will not be giving anyone updates Shan...sorry!  Julian probably won't have much time to but if he does then great.  Maybe he'll update his facebook status or something so that anyone that wants to see can, but it's also very likely that given the fact that I'm sitting/laying next to him in a ton of pain with docs around and his kid on the way, he may not be in a posting mood haha.  I CAN tell you that I am REALLY hoping the baby is born as early and quickly as possible and my goal is to get her out by the evening of the 27th (Thursday).  They say that first labors usually take about 18 hours....but inductions can take longer and up to 3 days. She should be here by the weekend though (dear God, I hope so). 

I am really nervous for how much it is going to hurt.  I have been having a lot of contractions at home on a regular basis and keep praying that they will get stronger so that I go into labor on my own and do not have to be induced....but knowing how Leah's been this whole time....she'll take her time until she's ready and probably wait until the last minute and then go "ok."  At least that is how she was when she was breech and with taking the 3d ultrasounds when she decided she wasn't going to let anyone see her face....but oth times she pulled through and did what I wanted so maybe she will this time too!!  Or she'll just get evicted in a few days whether she wants to come out or not.

This is the last weekend that Julian and I will ever have without children.  I think it's pretty crazy and he does too.  As much as I want her out, I am sure that there will be times that I'll just wish I could tuck her back in and have the time to rest and relax and hang out and go to movies and diiners and um pretty much everything....but that's what the grandparents are for so they can watch her sometimes.  She should be here within the next 7 days.

Induction Date

Alright people....it's scheduled tentatively for August 26th....that's 8 days away.

I have to back track...I had a baby shower at my parents' house and it was so much fun. Leah got tons of gifts and stuff that will help us through the baby stages. So now we are busy getting things washed...Julian built the pack in play and the infant swing and I am still working on getting everything put away in the nursery and bathroom and storage for her.

I went to my doctor appt. He wasn't there but I saw someone else. She checked to see if I am dilated....and I am not. This time is was NOT as painful as the last time...the last time I had enough time to break into tears and such but this time it was like in and out- done. Apparently this is how it is supposed to be....so girls, don't worry about it for when it happens to you...they said that it is less painful the more pregnant you are....

So she checked my uterus size and I am still measuring about 2 weeks behind where I should be but for whatever reason, they say its fine. I keep growing but at some point I just lost 2 cm.

So next Wednesday I will be 38 weeks pregnant exactly. I will call the hosptial at 5pm just to make sure they are not full. If they are full then my induction will be postponed. If they are not full, then I am supposed to have a light meal and then get to the hospital at 7pm. Then they will "strip my membranes" and I have a feeling that this is NOT going to be fun. Once we are there, we stay until the baby comes but I have been told that it can be a long and painful journey up to 3 days when u are induced.....Starting Thursday morning, they will give me Pitocin which is a drug to make me start contracting harder and quicker than a natural progression.....I will patiently wait for my epidural but once I hit like 3 cm to 4 cm, they better give it to me. Julian and Sarah will be there with me and Sar- make sure they give me my epidural and remind me that I'll live through it. Julian, sorry in advance. haha Just kidding, I will really try to be as calm as possible but I'm not so great with pain and I'm freaked out!

I have two NST's scheduled before this appt to make sure the baby is okay....and of course there is always the possibility that she'll come before next wed....but I don't think she will.

Anyway, keep your fingers crossed....and don't expect any calls or texts until at least late Thursday night or on Friday. It's going ot be a long road I think. Positive thoughts people....send them our way.

Crazy business.

36 weeks

The baby is considered full term at 37 weeks so just one more to go before we're pretty much in the clear....although if born now, she should be fine and only have a short NICU stay....she should be over 6 pounds by now...

The contractions have gotten better and I don't really notice them but the real labor ones I know will suck....at least they'll bring her out.

I tried to crochet a hat and didn't make it past the trying to learn the basic stitch and do a row.  I need help and am very frustrated.  I tried for over 3 hours.  Nic, where are you when I need you???

Sarah came over and put a few finishing touches on the nursery.  Thanks for that :)

We had our last birthing class and saw the hospital tour.  I am pretty sure one of the girls in class was in labor...she's 38 weeks and had to stop every few minutes bc of her contractions...she was so weepy and hormonal and I just really am not looking forward to that part.

My shower in Sac is this weekend and it should be fun...after that, it's just time to birth this baby.  It's getting close!!! They want to induce at 39 ish weeks depending on dilation and effacement/thinning of the cervix.  So if things go as planned it's just 3 short weeks (they'll feel long to me, though) and then she's here.  It's crazy to think about though.

Tomor- 36 weeks

Thursday- dr. appt.

Sat. Shower

Monday- dr appt. (he'll check my cervix to see if I am dilated at all....this HURTS)

Tues.- Newborn Care Class

Wed- 37 weeks!

Thurs. Doc appt.

Mon.-Doc appt.

Wed. 38 Weeks! doc looking to induce if body is ready or blood pressure is high.

Thurs-dr. appt.

Mon dr. appt.

Wed. 39 weeks...BABY. oh shit.

the part in italics is just guestimated bc i know i have 2-3 appts a week and know that they want to induce at 39 weeks but the appts could be off a day or two. i just felt like giving a sample haha.

labor and deliver trip 1

Well tonight I was cramping and called in....they asked me a bunch of questions and said to just come in....so I went in at 34 weeks, 6 days pregnant and if I was going into labor, they would stop it or at least give steroid shots to help her lungs. Once it hit midnight and my contractions were 3-5 minutes apart and the nurse said she thought it might be time, I was informed that since I had turned 35 weeks, they would no longer stop labor or give steroid shots for the lungs. To make a long story short, I am still contracting but I am not dilated at all so the contractions are not putting me into labor....she said that I am definately having contractions and they are close enough together but the intensity isn't strong enough yet....that could take weeks (it could really happen at any time though) She said that I don't need to time them anymore since it's obvious that I am meeting the time deasdline already but to just wait until it is hard to talk thrugh a contraction to start timing it....they said they had me come in originally bc i was still before the 35 week mark but since I turned 35 weeks in the hospital, now it's just about the real deal. No one is stopping anything....come in when it's time to push the baby out.

By the way, it was not pleasant to have the lady stick her right arm up my hoo ha, nor was it fun to have the speculum shoved up either. I vote for Julian to carry the next child of ours.

Over and Out.

3d pics of Leah around 33 weeks...

Doc appt.

So today we had a tiny scare but apparently nothing big....I went for my usual biweekly NST.  It can take anywhere from 30 to an hour and  a half usually (they need to get enough time of the baby being active and seeing that her heart is okay bc an active baby is a happy baby apparently).  So after a good 45 minutes, the nurse took my heartstrip to the doctor and she came back and told the other girl in the room she could go but I couldn't....so she left me hooked up and I noticed that Leah's heartrate kept dropping and so I started to freak out....so then after I had been hooked up for two hours, my doctor came in and pulled the curtains to block me from the other patients.  He did an ultrasoun because he wanted to see what was going on and he checked to make sure the cord wasn't wrapped around her neck.  It wasn't so that's good.  He couldn't explain to me why that happened but after assessing her ultrasound said that she looked fine and healthy...she was moving a lot, etc.  So even though I am a worry wart, I feel that it's best to just trust the guy.  I have another appt on Monday morning so it will be good to see everything is fine.

I talked to him about inducing me and he said that he will start to check my cervix around 37 or 38 weeks and if I am "ripe" which means dialated and soft cervix that is shortening, then we can talk about taking her out. He wants to go with my body but still won't let me go past 40 weeks.  My stepdad doesn't want the baby to stay in past 39 weeks.  He told me to give my doctor his number (he's been a baby doc for over 32 years)  and wants my doc to call him if he wants to talk about it (not in a threatening way....just concerned).  He says with high bp nothing but trouble will come from leaving the baby in there longer than she needs to be.  So we'll see what happens.  I am not going to bring that up with my doc for a few more weeks because I was a pain in the ass today already with all my freaking out (but when people come in bc there's something wrong with your baby's heartrate, it's not easy to just be like "oh, okay, that's cool")  Anyway, the baby has been active so that's good.  I'm having another sleepless night but apparently that's the way it's going to be.  Heartburn is getting really old, too.  well....only about 6 or less weeks until even more sleepless nights :)

34 weeks

Well...the baby flipped back a week ago (can't remember if I posted that or not) so she's head down and apparently dropping a little lower which is good because it will be harder (I assume) for her to flip back to breech.  If she does flip back, I don't think that I am going to let them manually flip her because I've heard from a few people (including a labor ad delivery nurse) that have said that it can actually cause harm because there is often a reason the baby goes breech....like the way the cord is wrapped or whatnot and that it can be painful and a lot of times babies will just flip right back to breech anyway.  

We had our first baby shower in San Mateo and it was a lot of fun.  Looking at the pictures, I look look like a whale but I should appreciate it because soon I'll be a lot bigger.  It is one month from the 38 weeks they said they'd most likely induce me at.  But....they switched my medicine because my BP has been too high so we shall see if they want me to go full term now (like if the meds balance out the bp)  I am going to discuss this with my doctor on Friday when I see him.  I want to see if there is a way to get an induction date now that it's sooner or if it's still a wait and see thing.  At least with an induction date, it would be nice to KNOW that the baby is coming on that time.   We'll see.  Not sure if i posted before but all of the tests I had last week came back normal and fine with her measurements, etc.

Starting tomorrow I have to test my pee daily for protein (yay) because it's a sign of preeclampsia if there is protein in the urine.  The NST appointments this week have gone well.  Leah looks good and has a good heartrate.  I've been cramping but nothing too bad.  

I read a news article about a woman that went crazy and killed her baby and then ate his toes and brain.  I don't know why I found the urge to share that but um fun fact.

The baby should weigh about the same as a standard cantaloupe (close to 5 pounds).  My stepdad is a baby doc and he said if I (when I) get to 35 weeks, it's a good cutoff point to know the baby should be pretty much fine.  

Well 34 weeks down and 6 more to go (maybe less!!!)  Doc appt on Friday so hopefully more to post then.

ps JP posted on the last blog on how to leave commets...apparently u have to hit tab a bunch of times or something.  Thanks, JP.

33 weeks

Well....I have had a few appts recently. The first one my blood pressure was really high so after we saw the baby was okay, he sent me for a check on my blood....don't know what he was checking for exactly but everything was okay.  Then today I had an ultrasound and her measurements seemed a bit behind but i think it has to be 2 weeks at least to cause concern....and i don't remember seeing anything that was the far behind.....my doc will talk to me about this next week.  She weighs an estimated 4 pounds 7 ounces which is bigger than what I was when I was born.  

I am kinda cramping so this is going to be short but I'll update soon.  Our first baby shower is on Saturday. :)

ps the nursery is coming along and we have the belly cast made but not painted yet....pictures of everythign to come.

32 weeks

Well.... I went to my 2 doc appts for the day and the first one was the NST appt where they do the ultrasound and check the amniotic fluid and the baby's heartrate, etc.... That lasted an hour. She said to me, "Now was your baby breech last week?" And I told her no but I hoped she wasn't this week....alas, she is. Sarah says not to worry and so did the doc. They said there is plenty of time for her to turn and that they will try to turn her startinag at 34 weeks I think.

My second appt was with my regular baby doc. He said that he's really happy with today's blood pressure. He also said that it is possible that my baby weighs 5 pounds by now which is what the 3d ultrasound lady guessed (I still think that's unlikley bc Julian and I are small people and that would put me having a 9 pounder). The thing that kinda sucked was that I haven't grown (don't get me wrong, I have gained weight since last time but not tummy measurement) or should I say my uterus hasn't grown since 2 weeks ago. I should be 32 and I am still measuring 30. So he ordered a big ultrasound at the hospital (different than the one I get every 3-4 days now) so that they could get the measurements of the baby. It could be due to the high blood pressure or it could be due to the baby flipping positions and being curved differently. I'll post more on that when I know more...

The air conditioning broke yesterday and I was a baby about it....but try being about 8 months preg in a 90 degree apartment and seeing how you feel. Dude, I get hotter than any man around me does at this point. They came and fixed it which makes me very happy.

Yesterday I woke up and thought I had food poinsoning again but it prob wasn't...I threw up a little bit in the morning and felt horrible. Julian stayed home from work. After a few hours of sleep he said I got color back in my face and I started to feel better. It was fun to have him around. I think we should both not work and just hang out all day when the baby comes and before too. Julian put together the crib and dresser and changing table. They look really good! Now I need to clean up all the styrofoam bits all over, but after we get things settled I will post pics.

I bought a belly casting kit. Sarah is going to come over this weekend and help me do it. I should post a link to what that will look like because JP is going to be confused I think.

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.its-your-birth.com/images/belly_cast-smaller.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.its-your-birth.com/Belly_Casting.html&usg=__Gnee4Ol_hKj6tvsXVg_hNF5_Pyw=&h=300&w=250&sz=56&hl=en&start=17&sig2=4xCtA1nQH4W_yrcXLJoj3g&um=1&tbnid=u-neNsKlY5TF7M:&tbnh=116&tbnw=97&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbelly%2Bcast%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26um%3D1&ei=n4BfSsWGK4jp-QbgurznAQ

Then we (haha sarah, you know the truth) are going to paint it....I have no artistic skill but sar is good. I am so excited!

OK well....until next time. :)

birthing class 1

scared me.....seriously. We had to watch an 80s video of a woman giving natural childbirth and all the labor leading up to it....seriously, i am up at 6am bc i am freaked out. i was up at 4am freaked out too. i know that i am getting drugs for mine but i am still not feeling so good about it.

we are starting to get the nursery together this week which is fun...

i had to go into the hospital last friday bc of blood pressure. they hooked me up to a machine to judge contractions and the baby's heart rate and gave an ultrasound to check her and my amniotic fluid. everything was good and i have another appt this thursday....following this week i go in 2-3 times per week from here on out.

a c section is sounding more appealing to me now bc of that video...we see more videos the next 4 mondays so i'll keep you posted on my thoughts.

31 weeks

I was reading the update I get about each week of pregnancy....for 31 weeks it said "You might have some troupble sleeping as your little one does somersaults in your stomach"....alas, I am up right now writing this. At least it means she is doing okay. I have started to feel her around my right side, almost on my back. It is the strangest thing...and now I will feel her tapping or kicking in multiple places at once which is also different.

She should weigh about the same as 4 navel oranges, although the ultrasound lady guessed she would be close to 5 pounds by now (which is huge and I highly doubt she's that big) It's weird, though, because I was only 4 pounds when I was born, so it's nice to know that her weight is increasing so that she'll be okay if born early.

The crib and dresser come tomorrow between 2 and 5. I am excited but it won't be put together until next week but I can be patient.

I started filling out the paperwork for the hospital and they didn't have a box for interracial babies and I think they should. So I marked 3 boxes- asian, caucasian, and other and put what she is in it. I guess it's a good thing, though, because she shouldn't fit in a box and be all confined like that...

I am constantly hungry. I want to eat my 4th nectarine for the day but then I'll be sad tomorrow so I won't. I really want to though.

I don't have much to update about the baby except that she's getting bigger, her kicks are stronger and all over, and she gives me a lot of heartburn. A true remedy that works is mixing half a teaspoon of baking soda with 4 oz of water....seriously, it works like a charm and instantly.

we have our CPR class tomorrow which will not be fun but it's good that we are doing.

ok I am going to walk around and see if that rocks her to sleep so I can go to sleep.

30 weeks

Well...there's no more than 10 weeks left of my pregnancy...today the doctor said that they will not let me go past my due date but they may induce much sooner....it's all wait and see.  He printed out the paperwork stating I cannot go back to work to start the school year, so that decision was made for me.

The baby should be close to 3 pounds and 16 inches long by now.  He seems to think that she has already rotated head down, but luckily I don't feel kicks to my ribs as of yet.

Starting at 32 weeks I am going to go to the doctor two times per week.  I guess they'll hook me up to a machine and monitor the baby's heart just to make sure that my hypertension is't taking a toll on her well being.  They'll be able to watch really closely which makes me feel good that they'll make sure she's okay regularly.

Heartburn is a regular thing now....but I am lucky because usually just drinking a glass of milk and then sleeping with two pillows can make it go away.  It's also really weird because I'll have periods of time where I just can't sleep. I guess this is normal....but recently I've been waking up around 5am for about an hour and then i can fall back asleep. Weight gain is um...really taking place. The only good news to this (besides the baby is growing) is that breastfeeding burns about  500-600 calories per day so it will help me lose some of it after she is here.

Her eyes can now move in their sockets....she will only be able to see pure reds, greens and yellows at birth thgouh (or distinguish those colors, i should say) but she'll still enjoy the girly colors as well (just a little later).  Her eyelids are no longer fused shut and she practices openign and clsoing her eyes and doing looking movements. Her brain is continuing to develop. She is taking a lot of calcium from me for her skeleton and iron for her red blood cells. The  hair that developped all over her body should be mostly gone by now except for patches on her back and shoulders and then we can now see if she has hair on her head.  It is unpigmented as of now.  (We have an ultrasound on Friday so I will know if she has a full head of hair or not by now).

Her movements are getting pretty firm but they don't hurt.   She seems to have a good temperament in the womb haha. She isn't over active where it drives me nuts, but she kicks enough each day to remind me that she's there and doing well.  It hasn't gotten old yet...I get really excited when she kicks.  I wonder how I'll feel as the weeks come to a close.  Who knows.

If I don't write sooner, happy 4th of July!

28 weeks...Happy Third Trimester!!

Yay! The third trimester is here! I am feeling pretty good...a bit tired, though.  I am getting very excited for the baby to come.  Sarah came over and helped me order wall decals for the nursery and we picked out a lavender colored rug.  Today i went out with Julian's mom and we picked out the crib, dresser, and changing table.  They'll be here in 1 to 2 weeks.  

The blood pressure nurse decided she wants to talk to me daily now instead of once a week....so about 5pm each day I will have a consultation with her. I think it's good, I guess, if that's what they think is safest for the baby.  This high blood pressure business gets taken seriously in pregnancy I am discovering.

New thigs to do: start kick counts each day to make sure the baby kicks 10 times within 2 hours and find the baby a pediatrician.  

27 weeks

Well things have been hectic with school ending. I finished today and then had pretty bad cramping and a headache that wouldn't go away.  They said that I had to come in to the doctor to be checked out.  I feel like I live there- I went last Friday too because of abdominal pain.

So they took out that ultrasound that they shove up you ( I think this was like my 5th one) and made sure that my cervix was ok...and it was.  And they checked the baby's heart and it looked good. She said that most likely I have been on my feet too much.....the doc told me last week that he thought I'd make it 4 more days but then if I had more he'd pull me from work....and she said that she's happy I made it that far, but that it's too much being on your feet and that I'd have to stop. They didn't put me on bedrest...just told me to take it easy and continue to monitor myself and call in.  She said that high risk pregnancies require going to the doctor a ton and to get used to it.  

One new piece of information was that she said for me to start to wrap my head around the fact that most likely they will be taking the baby out early. She said it is standard protocal in situations like this to take the baby out HOPEFULLY at 38 weeks but it can happen earlier. They have to do what is safest....so she didnt change my due date but she wants me to start to adjust to the idea of having the baby in August and that we'd talk more about this later.

Now on to baby news:

She should be getting close to 2 pounds....prob not quite there yet, but getting there.  Her brain is growing a lot and her lungs are contiuing to develop.  With medical attention she'd have a decent shot of living if born now. She should be nearing 14 and a half inches (But I have books that quote smaller....so prob between 10 and 14.)  I should have asked when they were doing that ultrasound but it wasn't even part of my thinking at that time.  Hiccups are common now and I thikn I have felt them a few times.  I'm sure that theyll get stronger.  Her kicks and punches are definitely stronger. I have had a few times where she punches me or kicks me right in my cervix and I flinch  and have to squat because it is so not comfortable to have it feel like the leg or arm is trying to get out.  Luckily it has only happened a few times. But it was shocking each time.

Ok well....seeing Ken and Katy today which will be fun.  I can't go out and have to stay resting for today at least so it's nice that they're coming here so I don't have to go out.

That's all for now.

26 weeks

Blood pressure Blues.  That is me right now.   So I think I told you guys that I have to monitor it every day and call in when it gets higher than 140/90...so today it was a good amount higher (160/103) and so alas, I am stuck at home resting today.  I actually wanted to go to work too because it is field day, the softball game, and I have an hour of prep time to myself...not to mention that we start talking about Puberty in Family Life and it's fun to watch the kids squirm and giggle.

So 26 weeks....The baby's lungs are continuing to develop. Now she breathes in and out small bits of fluid and is practicing the breathing movements to help her for when she is born.  She's putting on more fat now (so it says) and her kicks are definitely getting stronger.  I like it, though, because it reminds me she's alive and well.

Each week that she cooks is another week closer!  Some say the third trimester starts next week and others say at 28 weeks. So I will just probably celebrate them both.

ok....well, over and out.